Hearts have replaced my eyes, and I’m all stupid over a boy.
It really is the most magnificent feeling ever.
(via whitexelephant)
(via abstractnumbers)
(Source: hollyhocksandtulips, via whitexelephant)
I don’t really know how much more I an handle. We lost another kitten today. I held her in my arms as he went. I hate this feeling and that these kitties fought so hard.
Two weeks.
In the past two weeks, I have helped raise four kittens who were abandoned because a pitbull killed their mom. Last night, I had to take Steve, the kitten, to the emergency room. He had labored breathing, was lethargic and wasn’t eating. It was the scariest moment I have ever faced. I didn’t know whether I keep him home or take him for help. When I got to the vet they said his temperature wasnt registering on the thermometer, so they warmed him in an incubator. His temp was rising but as soon as Ashly walked in the door the nurse came out and asked me how far we wanted to go in saving his life and that he was taking a turn for the worse. Within five minutes he died. We held each other and cries in the lobby for a while and we got to say our goodbyes in a small, quaint room. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I never understood the connection that people have to their pets, especially when they pass away. I feel like I did something wrong. Maybe he wasn’t warm enough, or we didn’t give him enough attention. He was the kitten I was going to keep, and now he’s gone.
This morning we burried him in Ashlys backyard.
Other than that, I’ve been living at Ashly’s brothers house for two weeks. I haven’t gone home and I never really want to. Besides last night and a little this morning, I’ve been the happiest I’ve been in a really, really long time. It’s so peaceful, and the birds chirp and we has coffee on the porch. We make each other dinner and watch way to much mad men haha
Also, her brother is someone that I’ve had a crush on for a couple of years. He’s sweet, funny, handsome and he has a house. He does man shit like mowing the lawn and helping dig graves for our kitten. I told him I had feelings for him the other day, but we’re so damn awkward and shy that it’s going to take a while:)
I know what I’ve said the last few months, that I’d love my ex forever, and maybe I will, but I don’t want to be with him. I don’t want to be sad for my entire life, living this dreary life with hope and not reality. I want someone to love me back and mean it, and not leave me go someone else. It’s amazing how it feels to love someone. The butterflys, the smiling, hope and just pure happiness is so intense. And now I feel it again ad I think frank does to for his lady. And it’s amazing.
Anywho, it’s been an insane roller coaster the past two week. I miss my kitten and I want to cuddle with a boy:/
My poor baby is at the emergency vet. He wasnt eating, and couldn’t breathe very well. This is one of the worst feelings I’ve ever felt.
